MY LIFE IN JAPAN a blog from kyoto for friends and family

Well, there is a lot of news on the home front. For the benefit of those of you who missed the first few episodes, i will give a quick recap.

When last we left our hero, he had, somewhat glibly (though bravely perhaps), flown off to a small, overpopulated island on the other side of the world in order to be at the side of the exotic beauty that had stolen his heart just barely 18 months earlier. He had done this despite the fact that he had failed miserably in his attempts to find employment or a suitable visa, and despite the fact that he knew her parents ardently opposed his courtship. This was quite understandable, since in the lovers' haste to consummate their (likewise ardent) liason they had given nary a signal to her family concerning the rapid evolution of their relationship. Furthermore, the youth of our heroine and the "maturity" of our hero created a psychological and cultural obstacle to her elders granting their blessing to any prospective nuptuals. Sealing the apparent doom of this tryst were the cultural and linguistic barriers precluding communication and dialogue between this unexpected and impudent outsider and his lover's parents.

After the return of his beloved to Japan July last, the patient suitor waited 11 months before having settled his affairs enough to be able to embark on the great adventure all his hopes were hanging on. On his arrival, the first task our hero set out to do was to find suitable work, which he attempted with typical western efficiency, managing several eager prospective employers, only to have each reject him due to the aforementioned missing visa. Furthermore, he found himself running out of money, as he was inadvertently locked out of his bank account due to his inability to understand an ATM properly, leading to his pressing certain critically incorrect keys. Ever sanguine, our hero did not despair, but it became clear that the situation might become dire. Would our hero have to return home, empty handed, at the termination of his temporary visa? Would his prospective inlaws ever discover how far things had come while their daughter had been out of the protection of the nest? Would the couple ever reach the conjugal state? Would the narrator ever stop asking stupid rhetorical questions long enough to tell what happened????

Well, to add fuel to the fire, at this point the protagonist's possesions arrived by sea to the nearby port of Osaka, but needed to be speedily collected before fines and other penalties were incurred. This apparently simple task turned out to be rather complicated and stressful. Several attempts at negotiating the necessary assistance, professional and otherwiswe, led nowhere, and consumed time that our heroine needed to complete her scholastic duties. This was further exacerbated by the extra hours our heroine was working to provide for the household. Furthermore an attempt to arrange emergency funding from the protagonist's mother ended up being held up at the bank due to transcription and communication errors, neccesitating further time-consuming troubleshooting.

Somehow, despite the strains it was putting on them, the couple were, perhaps in emulation of our age's great statesmen, managing to stay the course. Feeling under pressure our heroine managed one final effort, and lo, the dawn arrived at last. An unexpected angel arrived to help recover the hero's stranded possessions, her bank relented on giving them the emergency funds (though they still have no access to his bank), and our hero managed to "volunteer" some labor at one of the schools that had denied him before, the most desirable in fact, thereby gaining valuable experience and the promise of future work.

One challenge remained. Our hero and his betrothed set out on a plan to visit her parents and confront them with the truth as soon as possible. In the back of their mind was the idea that having performed this sacred and ritual duty, they would be free to marry in japan, and thereby the hero would be entitled to acquire the much prized official fiat allowing him to stay in the country and become contractable (perhaps like a disease??) in the eyes of his prospective employers.

All would have been good if things had gone according to plan. Having meticulously arranged the trip so that it would be both economical and timely, they called her parents, who, exhibiting great distress, indicated that this was an inauspicious time to either visit or discuss the matter openly. However, indirect communication, requiring reading between the cultural lines, made it clear the way was open to "just doing it", and that fences could be mended later. So, instead of going to Niigata to visit her childhood home, they (we) had a lovely prehoneymoon in Tokyo. Photos will soon be posted...and then, on our return

WE WERE MARRIED ON THURSDAY JULY 27 2006 IN THE TOWN HALL OF KYOTO CITY, KYOTO PREFECTURE, JAPAN.

...well...not quite.... you see....it turns out the two conspirators had long been keeping a secret...a big secret. As fate would have it, the day before she was to return home, over a year ago, the two of them, driven as if by one thought, impulsively turned to each other, and simultaneously assented, though having planned to do otherwise, to marry then and there in the US, and keep it secret until such time as it was safe to tell her parents. This was neccessitated, if you will, by the long hiatus they saw they would be facing, during which they feared unknown and unwelcome anxieties, plots, and intrigues that might attempt to rend asunder their firm, but newly formed association. At first expecting to divulge this secret within days, the unexpectedly unrelenting resistance they encountered turned days into weeks and weeks into months, etc. Therefore, many of you reading this will be most surprised to learn that for some time while I was yet in your company I was actually already duly and legally married (though not in Japan...explaining this latest trip to the japanese justice of the peace.), despite my protestations or representations to the contrary.

Therefore, to all my dearest and must esteemed friends, I present my humblest apologies for this conniving subterfuge, with fondest hopes that, in the joy I hope you will feel for me surrounding this special event, you will be inspired to grant me your gracious forgiveness. And thus stands our tale to this day....

Labels: life in japan